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Fake Forgiveness, Passive Aggression and Why Being Grateful Suppresses Women’s Power

Ever heard of “fake forgiveness”? We all know that one person who outwardly claims to forgive, yet they hold onto feelings of hurt or resentment.

Pretending everything is fine can avoid arguments, but it stops us from having honest talks and healing our feelings. It’s like a temporary fix, and facing the truth leads to better understanding and real emotional healing.

In this episode, Karen reflects on her  journey of self-discovery and shares their thoughts on gratitude and forgiveness. She explores the idea of gratitude being linked to the patriarchy and how it may be used to suppress women’s power. She also discusses forgiveness and expresses her skepticism towards the concept of “fake forgiveness” and emphasises the importance of honesty and setting boundaries, rather than avoiding confrontation and pretending to forgive.

Fake it till you make it. I don’t like that. To me, it’s dishonest.

Key Takeaways:

  • How gratitude can occasionally create feelings of powerlessness contrasting with the empowering effect of appreciation.
  • The association of gratitude with dependency may be linked to the patriarchy and the suppression of women’s power.
  • How appreciation allows us to take ownership of our creations, providing a more empowering perspective.
  • The consequences of “fake forgiveness” and passive-aggressive behavior


03:12 – Differentiating between gratitude and appreciation
06:44 – Exploring the potential connection between gratitude and the patriarchy
09:51 – Challenging societal expectations of gratitude and appreciation
12:03 – Criticising the insincerity of some expressions of forgiveness and gratitude
15:16 – The importance of being true to oneself
19:07 – Triggering experiences and self-reflection
20:51 – Drawing the line and sending a message to the universe

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